Race Results
| This race is dedicated to the late Buddy Babbitt, aka GOBB24, who ran the race with the best of us… | ||||
  The Llamas of SLOW braved temperature and weather on this first SLOW race of 2005.. Our Camelid Camera caught this shot of a race team loading up for the big event. The weather was uncooperative for the 1st Llama Race of 2005 to say the least, but SLOW crews worked valiantly to make the race happen, whether it was clearing snow that separated the dry pits from the wet pits or making sure the bars stayed open later to occupy the racing llamas and alpacas that braved the cold of Lake Erie and environs. |
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The
SLOW Safety Crews were in place, Bucky and the Llamafeeder were both
on arial iceberg watch all weekend.  |
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 STATUS: scratched from race |
The teams all showed up, and they came with attitude,
or most of them did… Purdy showed up looking very
stylish in a coat, and immediately announced that she wasn’t racing
in the cold weather. Keeping the bars open late, in hindsight, was probably not a good idea, as the following picture will show. Several teams got into brawls the night before the race (this one between Dazed Llama and Llamaliner caught on camera) resulting in disqualifications, and the possibility of a rulebook is being considered, thanks to these two geniuses. (GO ahead and appeal.. we need the laugh. Send beer money with written appeal). |
 STATUS: Dazed Llama and Llamaliner DQ’d |
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| Another victim of the late night bar entertainment was Skank-O-Matic. Apparently Skank got so wasted the night before the race, she sent a ringer guinea pig in to race in her place. SLOW officials quickly caught on, and another loser was disqualified. | ||||
 STATUS: Both DQ’d |
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| Ozzie Llama showed up ready for battle, as did Paintballin' Llama… | ||||
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| Once the race began, some Llamas broke down early. This
unidentified racer is shown being towed back to the dry pits… |
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Floyd, a last minute entry, was caught on
camera trying to use the local ferry instead of Certified SLOW Racing
Equipment…
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That left the field narrowed down to Alpo, Rabies, Dirt
Llama, One Leg Llama,
New Llama, NJ Llama Rider, BayLlama and Moonpie, and what a race it was. New
Llama took an early lead in
the rough water…and seemed to be handling it well (left).Ozzie Llama raced several laps with Paintballin' Llama… Apparently PB Llama was firing "paintballs" from below decks at Ozzie Llama… and Ozzie responded in kind, opening up with his AK… Paintballin' Llama is missing at this time... Alpo and Rabies teamed up and raced together. There is some rumor (we love rumors) that they are starting a team called the "Corsacans". Here they are braving the rough waters of Put-In-Bay (right)… |
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  Not
to be outdone, One
Leg Llama and Dirt
Llama teamed up to compete with the (rumor has it, probobly
cheating) team of Rabies and Alpo… Halfway
through the race, OLL and DL were arguing
over whose turn it was to throttle. Witnesses say that One Leg
Llama was seen near the end of the race clubbing Dirt
Llama over the
head with a length of "unobtanium titanium", which distracted
both, with devastating results (right).. Neither was hurt in the incident,
but apparently legal action is possible…NJ Llama Rider (left) rolled in with a veeery fresh looking boat. This new entry for 2004-2005 fared well, as he finished, but he is down on aerodynamics. He vows to return with a vengeance for the next event… |
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  MoonPie (left)
showed up with an equally fresh looking new rig, and had a great finish.
Other Llamas were seen looking this boat over in detail, perhaps
to find
MoonPie's secrets... Last but not least, Bayllama (right) rolled in looking very confident and the Bayllama Team of Bayllama and OneSpeedMike represented themselves well in this event.. |
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| At the end of the day, New Llama prevailed
in the rough water and won, but was immediately disqualified, as everybody
says he has unfair advantage.. (see appeal instructions above). Coming in second was the team of Rabies and Alpo, who are also very good in the rough, but another (unnamed racer) suggested that they cheated, so they were immediately disqualified. (see appeal instructions above) Team Bayllama, MoonPie and NJ Llama Rider fought hard until the end, and 1st Place is was awarded to Team BayLlama Offshore, followed closely by MoonPie (who found the finish line somehow) and NJ Llama Rider in 3rd.. OneSpeedMike credits the win to his "lucky" SLOW t-shirt, which he hasn't taken off for 4 years… MoonPie was unavailable for comment, as he is still looking for the loading ramp. SLOW also hopes to interview NJ Llama Rider in the near future. |
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